Tom trust in what God has allowed to happen, I know it doesn't seem clear to you and your family right now what is total going on, that's because we don't truly understand all the workings of God's mind, that's why he is God and we are not. Just trust and have "Faith" that God will make all things better for you and your family."God is still in the business of doing miracles". My family and I will be praying for you and your family and may God bless you all.